Square to be hip

Of all London bus routes, number 4 is the craziest, at least towards its end. Starting at Waterloo, it goes past the Aldwych law courts over Ludgate Hill towards St. Paul's. Then it bends round to Barbican and onto Angel. At Highbury Corner, it deviates wildly to Highbury Barn and Finsbury Park. Any tourist reading its advertised destination of Archway would be disappointed to find it then travels at a right-angle to Tufnell Park and towards Dartmouth Park Hill. The bus terminates at MacDonald Road in Archway. Coincidentally, there is a McDonald's on the corner.

So began my interest in the number 4. There are four points on the compass, four elements and no other number has such interesting angles. I am the third of my mother's four children.

But as for coincidence, what is it? I would have to say it was two events that appear meaningfully connected, but this connection cannot be proved. Say, for example, that the barcode on the chocolate bar you just bought turns out to be your phone number. Highly unlikely, but equally unlikely that Cadbury's are messing with your head.

One day I set out in search of the number four. The sky was clear except for the trails of the aeroplanes and the air was clear and as crisp as an apple from the tree. I took the number 4 as far south as it would take me and went west to, where else, Trafalgar Square. All London distances are measured from this point and I remembered the black and white tiles up the steps outside the National Gallery.

Standing on this chequered point, I bumped into a man who could only be known as the Cube (and also the Rock, the Red Pepper and Pythagoras).

The Cube worked behind the scenes at a West End theatre, raising and lowering the scenery. Recently, he had moved into film, choreographing large scale special effects. I had once stopped the Cube from getting into a fight with a criminal type and he grudgingly owed me a favour, which usually took the form of advice.

When I told him about my interest in the number four, he shook his head and asked if I had covered all the angles. He then reminded me that a cube has six sides. No dice, he said and walked off down the steps between the fountains.

I realised then I was not far from that other shape, Leicester Square, and made my way there. Here the open corners of the streets feeding into the entertainment more resemble a Catherine Wheel. I decided to concentrate on more serious squares: Brunswick, Mecklenburgh and Tavistock squares.

I wish I could share with you all the points of my research but I cut a lot of corners and did not take enough notes on my graph-lined notepaper. My feet blistered as I walked the streets of London. I was ridiculed, openly laughed at and even called a square.

To be honest, things went really wrong for me when I discovered the straight lines of Finsbury Circus.